a description of the amazing and exciting adventures i have here in baltimore--- and other lies.

 
If you look up "lesbian racoons" in google, there are no entries.
Who says the internet has nowhere to go?
(never fear, tho', there's plenty of hits for "lesbian lobsters.")


where's my whiskey. i wanna get tore up.
posted by gregorio at 12:12 PM

 
I have made a command decision concerning my porno name. Many of you may ( and many may not) know about the various porn film scripts I have rattlin' 'round this noggin o' mine, and if I were to produce said masterpieces, I will not want to associate my Christian name with the very same.( For privacy reasons, of course. ) Hey, if George Costanza can be Buck Nakked, I can have a name too.

So,I become, therefore, upon the advent of crappy, stilted and implausible dialogue, sets fashioned out of somebody's apartment and women covered with nothing but whipped cream and smiles: Rock Hart.
posted by gregorio at 9:55 PM

 
I just had the best massage last night. Not even My Greatest Foe (David B.) can take away the good feeling I have. If you have not had the chance, afford yourself an opportunity to be rubbed down, and if Doug Preston offers to practice on you, don't even hesitate. One word of caution: donot ask him to do it if you donot want to have a really deep down muscle massage. He really gets into the trouble spots, and if you are used to the scrunching of the shoulders most people call a massage then you are going to be really amazed. We went for about 2 1/2 hours, and he wants to come back in a few weeks to work out, as he says, "problems in my shoulders." He has this funky cd of javanese gong and bell music; all in all it was a very cool experience. And, since he is still a student, it was for free! ka-ching!

I am, therefore, in a much better mood than I was in the last post, which I apologize if it was a little to dark and whiney. But you get the good and bad here, no? Unfiltered gregorio to your heart's content.
(later, i will complain about how poor i am, but that is for another day)
posted by gregorio at 2:19 PM

 
I have come to the inescapable conclusion that my life is very boring. I base this on a review of all the other blogs I have read recently, as well as empirical evidence--- this being that, for example, today, all I did was read my book. "Dialogues" of Gregory the Great is not what I would call exciting, allbeit edifying. But, really, that's all I do. Don't meet new people. Same crappy job; in fact, having returned from vacation only 45 minuites, I remembered why I hate my job. A vacation that was crappy, anyway.

AND, I don't want to hear the same stuff. "Quit your job, get a new one." As if it would be o, so easy.
"Go out, meet new people." OK, social butterfly, where? Groups? The ones which meet at night when I am at work? School? I really don't like those people. Bars and clubs? With what money, being that the MSE is paying less than what junkies make in a year. Even tapping David B.'s phone isn't any fun any more.

The only good thing is that I have been hired to teach by the community association where I have erstwhile been a volunteer, which is the only thing keeping the razors from flesh.

Where's my whiskey. I wanna get tore up.
posted by gregorio at 6:24 PM

 
WOW!
What a long, strange trip it has been! I want to apologize for not having updated this blog earlier. I have been having so much fun I have neglected all my fans! Not to worry tho, like MacArthur, I have returned.

For those of you who have never been to Ibiza, I recomend going. This small, undespoiled island off the coast of Spain is often overlooked by the mainland tourist trade. The natives are friendly and helpful, and prices are not expensive at all! I was able to stay an extra week for only 75 euros more, including hotel!
The beaches are pristine, and, I must add, the most you will see is the occasional English or German couple. Watch out though, they can be crazy! One of the English ladies almost took off her hat, and the Germans wanted me to take pictures of them shitting on each other. What a hoot!

Next on my travel log: New York on $5.00 a day!
posted by gregorio at 8:23 PM